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Saturday, October 12, 2024

Secret to aging gracefully

“Maralit says ‘I believe that giving the best of yourself to whatever you do gives you the most satisfaction more than material things in life’”

The 74-year-old five-foot-nine retiree had a club speed of 80 mph with his 6-iron as he got himself around the green with a bag of interview questions meant for him as an elderly.

What, among others, was his secret for aging gracefully.

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The Alitagtag, Batangas-born two-star ranked former Director of the Philippine National Police (PNP Directorate for Police and Community Relations) Cris Maralit was on the beam when interviewed by us on how things have been since his compulsory retirement in May 2004.

He was only 56 but had then completed 33 years of meritorious service with the then Philippine Constabulary and later the Philippine National Police.

He is now spending his retirement years in the United States where he has been based since 2005, worked there and retired as Background Investigator at the Baltimore County Police Department in 2020.

But he has traveled to parts of Asia and Europe before he retired with his family, although he admits “It is my dream to travel and see the world at least once a year.”

On aging gracefully, Maralit says he does not have “any steadfast or storybook secret on aging gracefully.

But he adds: “Maybe it’s about living my life as quietly as possible, avoiding as much as possible all outside distractions, savoring the small things that I can get from my retirement income, and stop thinking about the things I could have done and should not have done in the past.

“In short, I am contented with what I had achieved in the past and what I now have at present to enjoy the remaining years of my life.”

But Maralit, holder of a masteral degree in Communication Management, major in Corporate Communication, at the Manila-based Asian Institute of Journalism and Communication in 1996, is rather particular about one thing he should have done when he was younger.

We get the details from the good-natured father of two daughters – Maria Cristina, senior reporter of The Manila Times, and Heather Grace, now based in Dubai who gifted him with three granddaughters.

GG: Are there things you now remember as an elderly that you should have done when you were younger?

CM: A very particular thing I now remember as an elderly that I should have done when I was younger is I should have spent much more quality time with my parents, especially during the last few years of their lives.

I was way too engrossed with my professional career as a military/police officer I did not give enough time to myself to be with them even on important family occasions or during their times of illness and incapacitation.

In their waning years, material things and comfort children give them were not as important as the attention that they so much deserved.

As I grew old, I began to feel the same void they had surely felt of being far from my own children and how I wished they would be with me all these times.

GG: Any changes in lifestyle, diet after retirement?.

CM: No significant changes in diet. I eat practically the same kind of food when I was younger, which is more on vegetable and seafood and less of meat, particularly pork.

As for lifestyle, I really miss those “nocturnal activities” when I was a media person and later as AFP and PNP officer. Now I am more of a homebody and have a more routine sleeping routine.

GG: Any maintenance medicines? How long have you been taking them?

CM: Aside from the usual vitamin supplements, my maintenance medicines include metformin for pre-diabetes (thank God it’s still that stage although there are a number of restrictions already), aspirin, lisinopril and atorvastatin for high blood pressure and cholesterol.

As far as I can remember, I’ve been taking those maintenance medicines for about eight years already.

GG: What do you do now that you are retired?

CM: For the most part of the week , I do “apostolate work” (helping my wife babysit her two great grand grandchildren). Every Tuesday is my “day off” and I play golf with a group of fellow Filipino retirees.

GG: Have you had any surgeries pre- or during retirement?

CM: I underwent appendectomy when I was a college freshman at the University of Santo Tomas in 1964; and then cholecystectomy (surgical removal of the gall bladder) in 1986.

GG: How do you handle stress now? Was there more stress when you were still working or what?

CM: There is definitely less stress now than when I was working both here in the USA and in the Philippines.

Now I control my time and have no worries as to what time I had to go to sleep and wake up the following morning to prepare and go to work.

Now, when I’m a bit stressed, I either just sit down and relax in front of the television, or go out and have a short stroll in the nearby park or mall.

When I was still working, there was more stress especially when I was in the PNP and holding a position of major responsibility.

I had to follow a very strict regimen, insure that everything was in order and the officers and men under me were focused on their respective assignments.

Oftentimes, I still carried the problems of the office after work and I became irritable at home. I often had sleepless nights thinking what I would have or have not done regarding the problems that confronted me during the day.

GG: What time do you retire to bed? What time do you wake up now that you are retired? Your breakfast consists of what?

CM: I usually retire to bed between 10 and 11PM, unless there is a particularly good television show/program that I am too engrossed (in) to watch and finish.

However, no matter how late I slept at night, I usually wake up around seven the following morning and, by force of habit, turn on the television for the early morning news here and in the Philippines.

My breakfast regularly consists of two slices of bread and coffee with either a hard-boiled egg or banana.

GG: Are you active in any community activities, including those in religious organizations?

CM: I regularly attend activities of a number of Filipino-American clubs/association in the Baltimore, Maryland area. Until the COVID-19 pandemic, I was actively involved as a founding director (in) FIRST ACT, INC., a non-profit organization that promotes Philippine art and culture among the Filipino-American youth in the Baltimore area.

I was also the organizer/tournament director of the FIRST ACT, INC. golf tournament, a yearly charitable golf event to raise funds for the association. I hosted it for nine straight years until the pandemic slowed things down in 2020.

To the credit of FIRST ACT, INC., for many years my golf tournament held the distinction of being the largest Filipino association-sponsored golf event in Baltimore in terms of participating Filipino and American players.

GG: How many glasses of water do you take every day? Do you drink sodas, wine?

CM: I regularly drink at least six glasses of water every day.

During my golf day, I drink at least two more bottled water, plus a bottle of iced tea. For years since my cholecystectomy, I rarely touched any kind of soda.

On social occasions or occasionally while watching television I had a glass of wine, but never liquor or any other kind of alcohol.

GG: At what age did you start feeling you are physically weaker than previously?

CM: I felt a little downhill when I turned 70 because I drove the golf ball some distance shorter than the year before.

GG: Do you wear graded glasses? What’s your lens’ grade? How long have you been wearing them?

CM: I used to wear eyeglasses with a 250-lens grade since 1992. In 2011 I underwent cataract surgery at the Wilmer Eye Institute of the Johns Hopkins Hospital in Baltimore.

Since then I had discarded my eyeglasses and my eyesight remains as good as normal.

GG: How do you address the fact of getting old?

CM: I just want to be at peace with and true to myself now that I’m in the last quarter of my worldly life and I cannot relive the fast life I had before.

I want to be very thankful that I have lived a very fruitful life and I now fully acknowledge my frailty and do not entertain anymore illusion that I still have the physical strength and endurance to do most of the things I loved when I was in the spring of life.

I have to be real and do not have to entertain any illusion that I can still do things the way I did in my younger years. In short, I now have the inner peace in the realization that life has been very good to me.

GG: Would you hide your true age? If so, any reason, if not, why not?

CM: I have never hidden my true age ever. I have never, ever lied to anyone asking about my true age.

I have always believed there is dignity in growing old and age is not the only thing that matters most. It is how you carry yourself and face things with dignity, no matter what the situation is.

Besides, there were many times that people said my look and physical appearance belie my real age

GG: Lessons in life to inculcate in the minds of my offspring. The younger generations.

CM: I have always reminded my two daughters that “there is definitely no shortcut and easy path to success” and that one has to work hard and diligently to achieve the goals in life.

For the younger generations, all I can say is to “respect the past because disregarding it completely will surely haunt them during the lowest point in their lives.”

GG: Your philosophy in life, as public servant, as a person.

CM:. I have always been a fervent believer in the Golden Rule, and that fairness in words and deed is the true measure of oneself as a person.

As a public servant and a person, I believe that giving the best of yourself to whatever you do gives you the most satisfaction more than material things in life.

It is not physically quantifiable but it will leave a lasting impression to people that you will leave behind.

GG: What are your concerns as an elderly?

CM: As an elderly, I’d like very much to still do some of the things that I should have done earlier. I would also like to feel still useful to my family, especially my daughters and my grandchildren.

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