Protecting your relationship during this time of stress and separation due to COVID-19 lockdown has been a bit of a challenge. No amount of virtual communication can replace physical intimacy and talking to the one you love in the flesh.
For celebrity life coach Myke Celis, who’s also the best selling author of the #bestmeever book series, this self-isolation that we are in is one game-changer when it comes to relationships. According to him, the quarantine threatens everyone with the drastic changes it brings.
Admittedly, people who are very much in love but have been separated by the enhanced community quarantine find it a little challenging to adjust simply because they have gotten used to being together.
Suddenly, no more after work strolls, Friday night days, and weekend cuddles. And these changes can cause havoc in relationships if not addressed properly.
“It changes the way people view their relationships. Whether romantic ones or those with their family and friends, people begin to re-assess their value. The lockdown makes us think whether a relationship is worth keeping during the time when we have little or no physical interaction with the people involved. This is particularly harder for those in the baby stages of their romantic relationship where being together always has become part of an unspoken routine,” Celis pointed out.
What exactly is the biggest issue that surfaces during the lockdown?
“More often than not, trust issues surface. People begin to doubt unreasonably. Simply because they can›t see the other person as often as they want to. Sometimes it›s also self-projection on the other person based on unresolved issues he or she may have before,” he related.
“People whose love language is quality time and physical touch can also have difficulties in expressing them because of the physical distancing the current COVID-19 situation requires,” he added.
Given those concerns, Celis further said that it is a case to case basis because some people take it as a challenge, others feel sad about it, and there are people who act angry and frustrated.
“There›s a certain longing to make things go back as they use to be. But truth be told, and I always say this, after the lockdown, every single one of us won›t be the same person again, based on the choices we made,” he stressed out.
Here are a few tips that the life coach suggests to help people and their relationships survive the enhanced community quarantine:
See the lockdown as a blessing
By changing your space from being resentful to being open, you are able to discover more and fully understand the situation without being overwhelmed by your emotions. This will allow you and your partner to grow in harmony in your current space.
Have virtual dates
Never underestimate the power of video calls (whether Facetime or via Whatsapp or Facebook). Then watch movies together online and enjoy your popcorn. Or go outside and exercise in the morning and show each other the sights you have seen via simultaneous video calls too. Virtual dates give you that feeling that you’re actually together with the real-time virtual interaction, which can lessen the longing.
Make your presence felt more
Send Facebook messages once in a while. Funny memes. Random pictures about how your day is going. Little things in between. Assure your partner that you are still there and that you are thinking about them.
Communicate openly
This is very important if you want to make the relationship work. Be honest with your feelings. Express your fears, your worries, your concerns. Ask for support and give the same thing to your partner. By having a clear understanding of what each one is going through, you are able to prevent any complications that may arise from dangerous assumptions.
End your day always by asking the person how his or her day was
This means a lot. Allow yourself and your loved one to engage in a meaningful conversation. Be genuinely interested and feel free to help your partner process everything that has happened that day. By ending each day on a positively clear note, you can ensure that both of you will be able to sleep soundly as you prepare for the next day ahead.
“It takes two to tango. Do your part. Remember why you fell in love with that person in the first place. Now, more than ever, is the best time to find more and more new reasons to fall in love with the same person as you find more and more ways to express it, given your current space. In the end, what’s meant to be, will be. Your love story, included,” Celis concluded.