“The stress zones despite, both display every now and then a funny bone that is easily seen by their clients and patients”
The phrases summarize what two elderly – a lawyer and a family physician – consider their secret to graceful aging, their sense of humor often chasing their serious thoughts.
They are lawyer Laoag, Ilocos Norte-born Ameurfina Respicio, who retired from government service in 2007 after 13 years as provincial board member, while the Badoc, Ilocos Norte-born doctor, Manuel D. Cajigal, himself retired as hospital administrator.
The University of the Philippines-educated Respicio, who has four children and one grandchild, now lives her retirement years in her hometown while Cajigal, alumnus of the Manila Central University, now lives in Bantay, Ilocos Sur, 45 kilometers from his birthplace in Caraitan.
Cajigal was trained as general surgeon at Veterans Memorial Medical Center and Pediatric Surgeon at the Philippine Children’s Medical Center, formerly Lungsod ng Kabataan. He is now practicing as certified family physician.
The genial Respicio has reduced her amount of sugar, salt and cholesterol in the food she eats but admits “I still permit myself to eat what I should not every now and then.”
She has been taking maintenance medication for cholesterol, sugar, heart and nerves since 2016, longer than Cajigal who has been taking maintenance medicines for hypertension in the past two years.
The stress zones despite, both display every now and then a funny bone that is easily seen by their clients and patients.
Let’s read their thoughts.
GG: What do you do now that you are retired?
Amor Respicio (AR): I still practice law as a private lawyer. In fact, during the pandemic I had to move my law office to my library here at home so it would be more convenient and I would not have to worry about traveling to and from the office. I have limited the number of cases that I accept and handle.
As much as I have contemplated retirement, I cannot picture myself living out the rest of my years in retirement without being busy and productive with my time.
I get restless when there isn’t much to do so I fill up my schedule as much as I can. It is good to keep the mind sharp and the body active.
Manuel Cajigal (MC): Exercise and gardening in the morning. Consultation in the afternoon.
GG: How do you handle stress now? Was there more stress when you were still working or what?
MC: More stress when working because I started a hospital cooperative, we started small and I was able to make it big. My children absorb the stress.
AR: I would say there was more stress before 2020 than now but it is just about the same when it comes to stress levels. There are just different things to be stressed on.
When it comes to stress management, I seldom read the news especially local news because I easily get affected by it.
Attending social activities such as class reunions, birthdays and weddings or whatever occasion I am invited to which allows me to dress up, catch up with people I know, and let loose especially when asked to dance or play the piano.
I also watch netflix series and movies (and sometimes cartoons) to unwind, distract myself and de-stress from any worries of the day.
Lastly, I go on drives either at the end of work day or during the weekends to get some air especially at the beach which relaxes me.
GG: Are you active in any community activities, including those in religious organizations?
AR: I recently stepped down as Federation President of the Samahang Kababaihan sa Barangay-Laoag after 39 years since it was founded in 1983 and I am now its President Emeritus.
I am still active in Soroptimist International-Ilocos Norte Club after serving as its President for four years and District Director for Northern Luzon for two years. Lastly, I am a Lifetime Member of the Girl Scouts of the Philippines Ilocos Norte Council after serving as the Chairperson for Northern Luzon for six years and President of Ilocos Norte for also six years.
MC:: I am a director of the Philippine Red Cross Ilocos Sur Chapter.
GG: How many glasses of water do you take every day? Do you drink sodas, wine, etcetera?
AR: I honestly struggle with drinking water every day (on average, six glasses) unless it is coconut water. I drink soda especially when I see someone else serving and drinking it.
And I drink just a little bit of red wine twice a week to help me fall asleep every now and then.
MC: More than 10 glassful of warm water , very seldom I drink red wine. Sodas and fruit juices are my enemies, plenty of sugar. I drink green tea every morning and yellow ginger
GG: At what age did you start feeling physically weaker than previously?
AR: At age 73 when I started experiencing joint pains.
MC: A year ago after losing my wife.
GG: What is your secret, if any, to aging gracefully?
AR: I think having a sense of humor is great no matter how “corny” it may seem for other people.
I find that having a positive outlook in life full of smiles and laughter not only make you look young but feel young. That and, of course, my evening beauty regimen.
MC: Healthy life style, diet, exercise, sunlight, quality sleep (take melatonin every night), less stress (I pray and give my problem to Him and share it with my children, deep breathing frequently).
GG: Are there things you now remember as an elderly that you should have done when younger?
AR: Some regrets come with every year that passes by such as whether I could have done things better, more, or differently but none that I could honestly call a regret.
If there is one thing I do actually regret, it is that I should have taken time off work and visited my children more often while they were studying and now working in Metro Manila.
MC: My timetable was well planned by God with the assistance of my wife and now my children.
GG: How do you address the fact of getting old?
MC: Just live a simple happy life. Continue my daily routine and give myself to God. “Thy will be done.”
AR: It may sound cliche to say that “with age comes wisdom” or that “age is just a number” but there is truth in cliches.
The cumulative experiences in life — both failures and accomplishments — accord a certain amount of wisdom.
Age on the other hand only determines the length of time one has lived but not how well one has lived it.
Getting old does not mean your body breaks down and therefore becomes useless. There is so much more to do, and certain things you can only do now that you are older.
GG: Would you hide your true age? If so, any reason, if not, why not?
AR: When it comes to official records, I wouldn’t but if someone were to casually ask me what my age is, I would. (chased by her laughter)
MC: No, I look young active and feeling 40 (then quickly adds ‘that’s a joke’)
GG: Lessons in life you would like to inculcate in the minds of your offspring? And the younger generation?
MC: Love each other, Follow healthy lifestyle.
AR: To my children, and I have said this in speeches in front of graduating students in the past, “success is not measured by wealth but the number of people you have helped along the way.”
We spend so much of our lives accumulating so much money and possessions that it becomes our very definition of success, that we forget ourselves or become too focused on ourselves, and that we neglect the people around us: our families, friends or communities.
In fact, reaching out to those in need no matter how small makes an impact not just on that person but on you as well and it reaches even further than we are aware of.
That is the type of success no matter how much you work that not only feeds you but your soul.
To the younger generation, I would like to say that no matter how tough life can get or no matter how grim the outlook may be for our country, let us not give up and keep hoping for and working towards a better Philippines.
I would like to see more civic engagement and civic discourse between the youth and the government by being a part of the process, part of the solution towards change.
GG: Your philosophy in life as a person.
MC: Do good, do no harm.
AR: As a public servant, one must be proactive and not reactive.
One must go directly to constituents in a consultative manner to get to know them and their problems to create policy and/or project solutions, and not wait for them to come to you.
As a lawyer, one must make sure that there must be universal access to the law for every client whether they can pay for your legal services or not through pro bono cases and free legal aid on radio programs such as those I have hosted.
If I have to describe myself, I would say I am restless and passionate about my commitment to being a public servant and a lawyer.
I always find myself looking for stuff to do for people whether through scholarship grants, donation drives, motivational speeches, women empowerment workshops and seminars, and other projects and/or programs.
GG: How often do you go on world tour?
AR: I used to travel a lot locally and overseas to attend conventions and conferences since 1982.
I then made it a point that our family would as much as possible go on holiday abroad each year.
But since the pandemic, we have not been able to do so because I still get paranoid about COVID.
MC: Several times with my wife before to attend conventions, few relaxing and recharging work tour.
GG: Do you have any fears or concerns now that you are an elderly? Like anxieties on how many more years you may have as an elderly or some such?
AR: I don’t have any fears and concerns as I enter my twilight years because I have prepared myself for it.
With regard to my children and living heirs, I transferred all of my properties under their names when they all reached legal age to avoid any issues with inheritances in the future.
As for the civic organizations I have been involved in, I have made sure the present leaders are well-prepared and capable to ensure the continuity within these organizations.
In terms of anxieties towards my remaining years, it is not about what I should, would or could have done in the past to change things but what can still be done, and what more can be done.
MC: No fear. I want to put up a Home for the Aged, with vegetable garden and orchard at my birthplace.